Hey. Reviews! “London Calling”(Album) by the Clash and “Scout” (TF2) update

Hey kids!  How y’all been?  Good?  Fantastic, because I’m giving you an album AND game review.  Let’s start with London Calling.

Yes, this epic album made by the Clash in 1979 is quite honestly, my favorite album of the moment.  I can’t stop listening to it, and trust me, I tried.  Each track brims with personality, and it skips genres quite a bit, from pure punk (London Calling) to reggee (Revolution Rock), rockabilly (Brand New Cadillac) and ska (Rudie Can’t Fail).  Of course, since The Clash is(was) a PUNK band, all their genre experiments have an undercurrent of punk about them.  To say this is one of the best albums of the 70’s is an understatement.  Let’s see what the experts have to say, eh?

“25 years later, the record still moves— an astoundingly diverse, ambitious and inspired bit of politically-charged punk rock, as relevant and revolutionary today as it was in 1979.”

-Pitchfork, on the “100 best albums of the 70’s”, this album made #2

“London Calling is nineteen songs of apocalypse fueled by an unbending faith in rock & roll to beat back the darkness.”

-Rolling Stone, “The top 500 albums of all time”, number 8, London Calling

“Why the hell is this album only 4 and a half stars(on itunes)!?  This is the 7th greatest album of all time, it deserves 5-stars. Seventh Greatest.  Five Stars.  Buy NOW!!!!11!”

-AMAZING, some guy on itunes

Indeed, AMAZING, why is it not 5 stars?  Oh wait,

LONDON CALLING=$$$$$

It is on Gears, baby!

(Oh, and if you don’t fall in love with Train In Vain, you have no soul.  Seriously, it’s one of the best songs ever.)

Oh, shit, that’s right, this is a gaming site, so uh…let’s review the 3-month old scout update from Team Fortress 2!

So, the scout update added 3 new weapons and several achevments for the scout class on TF2.  I had just bought it after Weepin heckled me into buying it, and I gotta say, it’s a great fucking game, 5 money signs or stars from this guy.  But we’re here to talk the scout.

The new weapons are:

THE FORCE A NATURE: a new, double barrel shotgun, for the sacrifice of having only 2 shells in at a time and a small decrease in power, you get a small knockback critical on an enemy hit with it, and you can finally, finally, have a double barreled shotty in TF2.

RATING: $$$$ “This is my BOOMSTICK!”

BONK ENERGY SODA: Doubles your speed for 30 seconds, but you can’t use any weapons while under it’s effects, and it removes the only midrange weapon the scout has, his pistol.  Lame.

RATING: $$$ “It’ll make you run faster than KENYANS!”

THE SANDMAN: The best weapon in the scout pack is this badboy, for the price of no longer double-jumping, you can launch a fastball at an enemy, which stuns them for a short amount of time, and should you hit them with the bat itself, kills them instantly.  Fuck.  Yes.

RATING: $$$$$ “EXIT LIGHT!  ENTER NIGHT!  TAKE MY HAND!  WE’RE OFF TA NEVER-NEVER LAND!! (Duhn, duhn dun dun da…)”

ACHEVES: I hate them in this pack.  Take down a sentry with a pistol?  Fuck that.

Rating: $ “I can haz sandmanz?”

OVERALL: $$$$, or four BONKS out of five.

“If you was from, where I was from, you’d be fuckin’ dead!”

Peace.

Trouble With Steam (full support email request to Valve)

Hello. I am currently having an issue downloading the Scout, and the Sniper vs Spy updates. I have tried following all the steps on the “Download stalls at a certain percentage” support topic (https://support.steampowered.com/kb_article.php?ref=6966-IADH-1503), except for the router step requiring me to directly plug my computer into the modem. My computer is on a different level of the house from the router and modem, and is connected via household electrical wiring, so this step is not feasible. Everytime I try to run the game, it says “This game is currently unavailable,” and the problem remains stuck at download starting at 81%; so I have started this troubleshooting process courtesy of this page: https://support.steampowered.com/kb_article.php?ref=4595-WEXN-6831 . I have reached this step, which has now cause an error the support pages don’t seem to have documented. “If renaming the clientregistry.blob file does not resolve the issue, please exit Steam and delete everything under the Steam installation directory except Steam.exe, the ClientRegistryOld.blob, and the /SteamApps folder - this will force Steam to update when you log in.” This is the error window I receive when attempting to relaunch the direct steam.exe executable: “Steam.exe (main exception): Win32 StructuredException at 0043D0BE : Attempt to read from virtual address 0 without appropriate access rights.” I am using an administrative account currently. I have also noticed that every failed attempt creates a new file titled as such: “Valve_2009_6_12T6_11_55C0.mdmp” made at 1:11 AM and “Valve_2009_6_12T6_41_59C0.mdmp” at 1:42 AM. I just now noticed that “Valve_2009_6_12T6_45_4C0.mdmp” was created at 1:45 AM when I did not attempt to relaunch Steam. I have attached these files for your review. Fortunately I have backed up the files step 3 requested me to delete in a seperate folder not located within Steam’s root folder. For your consumption I recommend this be looked into, because I do not believe any troubleshooting steps should cause errors that as of June 12th, 2009 at 1:49 CST, have no currently accessible support topic. Seriously, troubleshooting a troubleshooting step?

TF2: Update Reviews Soon!

NEXT WEEK. My full review for the Heavy, Scout, Sniper, and Spy updates are next week, including all of the game UI changes, weapons, game modes, maps, voice overs, and hilarity you can (hopefully) handle!

Wow…. I Haven’t Reviewed In a Long Time….

Thanks to collin for reminding me via facebook. and as for that 4 part epic return, that was just fail and a ham samich. So anyways… i geuss i should review a game whilst I’m here.

As some of you may already know i have siezed to be a halo lover. I still would kill for the series anyday but recently I switched to the call of duty series. the 2 most popular of which being Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare and Call of duty: World at War. Now seing as it would do injustice to the series to review it as a whole, i’m going to review them both individually now.

Call of Duty 4 is a game being the description of words. Right from the moment you place the disc in your tray, you fall in love with the russian civil war curently in progress and the rise to power of Al-Asad in the middle eastern theter. The game is exactaly what the title tells you: Modern Warfare. Fans of the series will allways have loved it’s large vista-like battles in open areas where death could come from every angle and tacticle descisions had to be made in order to survive a single bullet kill. Modern warfare changes the venue and places you in a war that can’t even be desribed as war. In the large open areas previously described the was still the “my side, your side” tule  but in M.W. you know exactly where you enemy is wheater it be in a hallway or even in the streets of Baghdad. But the thing is, these people have no value for there own life or yours and because of this they will stand in a place where you could easily kill them but they know this and let you kill them as they fire a rocket at your or have a machine gun aimed upon your head, just waiting for you to step out of cover. and all of a sudden the large areas that you remember from the previous games comes down to just you and a street full of baddies. they can and will come from anywhere and you must kill every last one of them to advance, but unlike halo, there isn’t just the peole in front of you, there is them and infinite reinforcements. and as such a race against time in which must kill not all but enough of them to advance and when you advance you have little time to do so. this is what gives both COD 4 and COD WAW their attraction.

The multiplayer in Cod is nothing short of that experience but people have evolved out of that media and now hide and it is through hiding that anyone will survive the call of duty multiplayer. In COD’s multiplay you are allowed to custamize up to five “Classes” of chracters with guns or perks this isn’t unlocked until level 4 tho. when creating a class you must first select your gun from a list of assault rifles, sub-machine guns, Light machine guns, shotguns, and sniper rifles. then you can add a certain camoflague like desert, forrest, digital, etc. and once you unlock all challenges for a certain gun “family” than you can have “golden weapons”. what are challenges? challenges are how you will mainly gain your experience in COD these act just like achievements and often when  Dangerfly and I play COD together, he refers to them as achievements. once you reach level 55, you unlock a “prestige” this allows you to start completely over from level one with none of the guns you had unlocked but still play with players of your own skill. this is not only to help prevent against second acounters but it also keeps players in the game. and not bored once they reach the highest rank available.

Call of Duty: World at War is a game that will bring long time fans of the series a little welcoming gift. while the multiplay is not much different from COD 4. and the campaign is exactaly how I desribed with the “open areas”. there is something quite unique to COD WAW:

Nazi zombies brings a whole new deffinition to the term “survival mode” unlke in most games where you can select which wave to start at, in Nazi zombies you must always start at wave 1. At first the zombies move slow and moan like the normal dumb zombies you often see in movies. as you move up the levels they get progressively faster and deal more damage. at level 6 they begin running and by level 20 you’re in it for your life. as you move through the house and open the door, then stairs, you also open more areas from which they can enter. in the first area you open there is a random weapon box in which you can get any of the weapons in the game plus an alien ray gun.

so in all

COD4

Graphics: 7/10

Gameplay: 10/10

storyline: 5/10

Weapons: 10/10

A/I: 8/10

Multiplayer: 10/10

Final score 8.125/10

COD WAW

Graphics: 8/10

Gameplay: 10/10

storyline: 7/10

Weapons: 10/10

A/I: 8/10

Multiplayer: 10/10

Nazi Zombies 10/10

Final score 9/10

thanks and hope to see you all soon!

Ps. we are taking requests for reviews so email any of us for an idea.

OnLive :: GDC

This is huge.  Well that’s an understatement; MONUMENTAL.

OnLive, allows you to play virtually any game, on virtually any PC or Mac, or any TV.

ANY

Besides the fact that looking at those three letters together look weird after awhile of staring at them, you don’t need a high end PC or Mac (not like Apple makes very many low end computers), and with a console you buy from the company itself, play on any compatible TV.  Provided your TV has an HDMI port and you have an ethernet cable nearby said television, you can play on this fantastic console, any game; ANY game.

• Halo 3 on OnLive
• LittleBigPlanet on OnLive
• WoW on OnLive

I think I should eat my words just a teensy bit, because I am not sure it will be able to play Super Mario Galaxy, but might play Super Smash Bros. Brawl; WoW might be far-fetched too.

Entry level PC/Macs are included in the fun too.

MacBook Air rejoice!  Eee PC rejoice!

All your game console needs is an ethernet cable, HDMI cable, and a provided USB cable.  Did I mention that OnLive’s console fits into your pocket?

Granted that OnLive will need developer support to get this to work, they aren’t short of it!  It’s March, and OnLive goes live (no pun intended, but clearly was intended because I said “no pun intended” in the first place) in Winter, and already has other companies’ faith in the service.  Look at this list:

• Electronic Arts
• Ubisoft
• Take-Two Interactive
• WB Games (Warner Brothers)
• Eidos
• Atari
• CodeMasters
• Epic Games
• THQ
• 2D Boy (indie developer that brought you “World of Goo”)

Also, OnLive is getting huge support from the people at NVIDIA!

Games that are officially announced are bolded, and games that appeared in trailers for the service but has not been officially confirmed yet are italicized:

• Unreal Tournament III
• Burnout Paradise
• Mirror’s Edge
• Tom Clancy’s HAWX
• Crysis Warhead
• BioShock
• Gears of War
• World of Goo
• GRID
• Prince of Persia
• LEGO Batman
• Tomb Raider: Underworld

You have to go check this out, there are so many more features that will bring you on your knees in tears!  This brings GameTap and InstantAction to shame (WTF is with all the camel-cased service names?!?!)!

OnLive

Did I forget to mention that members of the executive team worked HUGE and NUMEROUS companies, one who founded Mozilla and Firefox AND Thunderbird ( as well as developed web “cookies” and SSL), and the CEO has been president of something-or-other at both Apple AND Microsoft?

Killzone 2: Second Thoughts

I guess the game just takes some getting used to. You will need to spend several hours of getting your ass handed to you, before you get 5 kills in one 30 minute round.

Killzone 2: First thoughts

Singleplayer: Fun yet the story isn’t compelling for me.

Multiplayer: 2 fucking bullets is all it takes to kill me? I spend 5 magazines killing the other damn guy! If this game is this fucking difficult, then at least give me a chance to fire one bullet into my own head dammit!

Posting Troubles

Faer will have some trouble posting to GoM now, he has lost his laptop now. I believe he has a computer still though.

That is all.

Incredious!

iPhone and iPod touch now have the new Tumblr application (in which the Tumblrette app and creator have dissapeared). It is now free. I will be posting more often naow?!

My near EPIC Return part 1

How do you all do? all three of you that read this blog? how have you been in my 4 months or so absence? well I’m fine and thanks for asking… So in my epic winsauce of of a return I will review a whopping 4 games for you (that’s right 4 games)in a 3 part seires. it’s been a long journey but let’s get started:

Oblivion:

Oblivion is a highly special interest game and by far my favorite of the RPG genre. It is better than sex, it’s better than that one last cigarette… when things are going your way… but when they aren’t, it’s a bloody pus-spewing maggot in hell. It will make even the hardest of the hardcore gamers cry like little babies when their lvl 42 paladin gets crushed by a giant red dragon.          

Oblivon breathes new life into the elder scrolls series and the RPG genre. They game is by far the most realistic RPG i’ve ever played, and not just because of the graphics which are good enough to make even the oldest gal wet. It is amazing because of how people react to you. how easy it is to die at the hands of some evil critter. I can admit that even I was afraid of sewer rats at the start of the game. 

Oblivon is about an adventurer (you), that is either an elf, dark elf, wood elf, nord(human), royalty(pretty human), or an orc, that is a male or female and can look however hideous or sexual as you want. The adventurer is freed from a dark dungeon by the king of cyrodil. as you and the king travel through the royal sewers. you learn that the kings bloodline has ended but there is one heir left to the throne. not long after you learn this. the king is assasinated and you bust take the kings amulet to the hidden heir he had with a prostitue or something and restore the bloodline or the world will fall into chaos… sounds easy right? WRONG. when you go and attempt to give some kid the amulet of kings. you learn fast that oblivion is not for the weak hearted. Just when you think one quest is done another pops up and punches you square in the face, literally half the time. My character in the game is a level 18 dark elf and that may sound sucky but believe me it’s a bitch to level up in this game. i had almost gotten done with the main quest and a majority of the side quests and just when i thaught i saw the end in sight… BAM EXPANSION PACK!!!

Oblivon Has 2 expansion packs, both of which are incredulous: Nights of the nine and the shivering isles. Nights of the nine isn’t so much an expansion pack it’s more of another mission series and is much longer than the main quest in oblivion. you travel around and collect all the gods’ armour and weapons and at the end you will fight the dark lord suran or something like that and it’s very slow paced. The second expansion pack: The shivering isles. is about a mysterious Door that opens up in the middle of a giant lake and all who open the door come out speaking in tongues and saying “he’s watching me!, He sees all!!!!” and other such possesed nonsense. so what do you do? of course you open the door. what else would advance the plot? hmm? taking the job in Chydenhalle? no you open the door and learn that  Sheogorath, the dark lord of the isles seeks a mortal as his champion? who else but Faer, the lvl 18 dark elf, eh? and well before you know your fighting clansmen and shouting “for the brotherhood” at the top of your lungs.

But i digress… i geuss that’s all i can entice you into playing it. But if you do wish to play it give it a good running chance… the sewer level at the start is so slow a tortoise could out run it but give it a chance at yit will grow on you.

score:

Graphics: 9/10

Gameplay: 10/10

storyline: 7/10

Weapons: 10/10

A/I: 10/10

Final score 9.1/10

Gears of war 2: